Thursday, November 18, 2010

Good Girl Gone Bad Is Not Gone Forever.

All too often we hear terms like ho, slut and skank used to describe women who have made some (or several) less than admirable sex-related decisions in life. Although most of the bad decisions we make can be chalked up to youth and/or being under the influence, the ghosts of a woman’s past haunt her regardless of maturation with age. Judged by the weight of past sins, it is difficult for a former girl gone wild to regain the respect of men and women.
Yet, in the same breath, we can use synonymous terms to describe a man and he is regarded with the same level of respect. His image remains (for the most part) intact, and his love life suffers no consequence. It is an unfair double standard that allots for the promiscuity of men while imposing saintly standards of sexual morality on women. The modern woman is liberated, embracing her independence and sensuality. There are many single, young women (and middle-aged divorcees) looking for fun over commitment—just like the guys. Should they be punished for exploring their wild sides, momentarily relinquishing inhibitions to satisfy healthy sexual appetites? Some women are naïve and fall victim to shysters with a mouthpiece. Should they be punished for growing pains? When the dust settles, most of us punish ourselves enough for past transgressions.
Bad decisions are learning lessons in preparation for the future. It is inevitable that all of us will stumble from time to time in various areas of life. Whether it is stripping, prostitution, pornography or just a lot of sex, poor decisions today do not determine tomorrow. There is a phrase “you can’t turn a ho into a housewife,” but every day philandering men are given a second, third, fourth, fifth (and the list goes on) chance.  Women deserve the same leeway and empathy, especially from other women. No one is tarnished goods because our pasts don’t dictate the present.  Taken from Madame Noire.  

This is clearly an issue for me.  Men often make me feel that I am not wifey material because  I have three kids with three baby daddies.  And because of this I have made a lot of poor choices when it comes to men.  Like I had to settle for what I could get because given my situation no man is ever going to want to marry me.  I shouldn't be treated any different from a woman with no kids but unfortunately in reality I do get treated different.  I deserve to be loved and respected just the same.  I am a WOMAN;I deserve the best of everything.

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