I haven’t post a blog in a minute. It’s been mostly pictures lately. It hard writing about general things. When I write in my notebook I know I’m the only that’s going to see it so it’s easier. I don’t want to be too personal when I write on my blog. It’s ok to share some things with the world but not everything. Nothing much has been going on with me. I say the same ole same. Haven’t been out that much. I call myself being in shut down mood right now. I don’t like to constantly be on the go. I have to relax and have time to myself every now and then. Bike week is next. I normally go but I’m on the fence about this year. I know if I go I’m not missing anything but I can’t handle the fact of being in Hartsville that weekend either. I really hate to miss it because I’m so used to going. My love life is the same as it has been. Junior and I still can’t seem to make each other understand the others point of view. We debate about the same subject over and over and every time we never get anywhere. We both know this so there really is no point in us talking about it but we still do. I hold back a lot when it comes to him. It’s so much I can say but I don’t. There is no point. Saturday I was so irritated with him. I tried to suck it up and enjoy our time together. I’m like him; I listen to what he isn’t saying. I know that’s not fair because I hate when he does it to me. Things didn’t end on a good note Saturday but I’m not stressed about that. I’m not getting anything out of it so I’m not losing anything. I’ve lost everything there is to be lost when it comes to him. I’ve tried leaving him so many times; I always go back. There is no other like him. If there is I doubt I’ll be able to find him. Now that I think about it, I didn’t get a “Happy Mother’s Day from him. Here we go with the games again. He emailed me twice after I left him Saturday. I didn’t see the email til yesterday so he probably thinks I was ignoring him. I did email him back once I saw them but he hasn’t responded. We said we weren’t going to play those silly games anymore. That’s why I emailed him to let him know I didn’t get his emails. I’m not stressing. My family life is good. I have no complaints about that at all. I’m extremely proud of my babies. Damian is the greatest kid ever. He helps me around the house. Always telling me how much he loves and cares for me. I told him I would want my boyfriend or husband to be just like him. He’s so laid back and well mannered. He’s just a great person. Roc is still very obnoxious but I’m very particular about him. I feel he needs me the most but lately he has shown me that he’s ok and I don’t have to worry so much. I always tell him if he needs me don’t hesitate to call. With him I’m one of those mothers thats ready to fight his battles if I have too. He’s the same with me. I think I have a special relationship with all my babies. Adrianna is the clingiest. This girl doesn’t want me out of her sight. I have a feeling it’s going to be me and her forever. By now she should have grown out of wanting to spend every moment with momma. I got a life I plan to live when she gets older so I need her to be independent. As for me in general, I’ve been having issues with “people” again. I can’t understand for the life of me why people feel the need to be so mean and selfish sometimes. Over the weekend I was thinking about things that irritate me when it comes to people. Then I thought to myself, I maybe no better. I just don’t pay much attention to it but I think I’m just as selfish as the selfish, mean people I’m complaining about. My momma is always there for me. Whenever I’m in a financial bind, I can go to my momma with no problem. I appreciate her and love her to death but I know I don’t show her just how much I appreciate her. I gave her a card for her birthday with some money in it. I felt I needed to do something for her. She is special to me and I want her to know that. I want to show her that. She never expects anything but if I got it of course I’m going to get it. I want to be better about giving her “just because” gifts. She’s an awesome mom and deserves to be treated special. With my kids it doesn’t bother me if I don’t get gifts for mother’s day, birthdays and things like that. They’re my babies. Their love is gift enough. Cleaning the house is a gift too. Lol. I guess my mom probably feels the way I feel when it comes to my kids. I made her mother’s day gift. I like doing creative things. I felt a kid in art class. She liked it too; she took it to work to show it off so that makes me feel like I did good. I meant to get a picture of the finished product but I didn’t. I wish more people were like my momma and me. I’m a firm believer in reciprocity. I feel like people always want something from me. Nobody wants to give. I think I’m, more if a giver. I go out of my way to make sure people are happy. I try to be considerate in every situation but I need to work on being considerate to everybody not just certain people. For the last few days I have been trying to figure out why people aren’t as nice any more. We all have issues with people who work in customer service from time to time. Most of the time we ignore it because it’s so common for people to be rude these days. I don’t think that I’m a people person but I’m receptionist so when I’m at work I’m overly friendly. I feel that is a requirement of my job. I’m here to help you in anyway I possibly can. So I go to Starbucks in Barnes&Noble to get a caramel Frappuccino. The dude fixes my frappe but doesn’t give me caramel on my whip cream. There have been times when I went in there and I didn’t get caramel on my whip cream but never said anything because it’s not a big deal. This particular day I was curious to know why he didn’t give me caramel. He told me he “just didn’t” give me caramel. I was so heated and upset. I didn’t say anything to him. His “just didn’t” response already had me thinking he thought I didn’t know any better, I’m just some dumb nigga so I didn’t act niggerish. Once he said I “just didn’t” it wasn’t about the caramel anymore. Your job is to provide customer service. People don’t do that anymore. He didn’t go that extra step for me. It hurt me. So now I’m boycotting that Starbucks. They’re employees of Barnes&Noble so I won’t boycott Starbucks.
No comments:
Post a Comment